Thing Number One:
"The Muscle Trials" [link] will be sent out tomorrow, so if you want to accept its incredible glory into your life and have your whole world forever awash forever in its beautiful light, PREORDER IT UP, PAL!

Thing Number Two:
Twitter shark [link]

Gluttons in Love [link] tomorrow night! The window of opportunity to preorder it is swiftly closing! And you don't want to risk ramming into a closed window. When you ram into a closed window, nobody wins. Best case...ABSOLUTE BEST case scenario, you just kinda wham off of it, which will hurt, but hey, life goes on. Worse? You succeed in breaking THROUGH the window in which case, great, you're in, but you're probably bleeding. And somebody's gonna have to PAY for that window, and guess who it'll be?

That's right. You.

So, don't ram windows! Instead, preorder a charming and thrilling illustrated weight gain fetish story! A far safer, more pleasing, and affordable indulgence than ramming into ANY window!

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE SPECIAL EDITION: [link]

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE REGULAR EDITION: [link]

TONIGHT THE BIG FAT MYTH MIX [link] IS GETTIN' SENT OUT

So preorder it now, while there is still sand in the top part of the hourglass! Before all the sand is down in the lame, opportunity-ending bottom part!

FUCK YOU, BOTTOM PART! And all your sand! Let the top part have it back!

What's that? The only way to give the sand back is to flip the whole hourglass upside down and turn the beloved top part into the new hated, sand-guzzling bottom part?

So there must always be a monster, and always a martyr...

Shit's deep

I misjudged you, hourglass.

Anyway, FAT MYTHOLOGICAL LADIES AND SUCH. It's awesome! Please consider givin' it a purchase!

Aaaahhh!

[link]

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

So Ms. Bodybuilder [link] is going to be deployed across emails world-wide tonight, so if you want in on the preorder action, this is my signature REMINDER JOURNAL ENTRY

Get in on the bodybuildin' action! It's EXCITIN'!

Also exciting: FUCK YEAH, THE TEAM BEHIND 'NIER' HAS BEEN REUNITED TO MAKE DRAKENGARD 3

Drakengard 1 was a dreadful mess which soared on the massive power of its imaginative and horrifying insanity, and Drakengard 2 was a mediocrity made by less brilliant and bizarre individuals, but NIER...now, Nier is one of my all-time favorite video games, and I was heartbroken that Cavia, the team behind it, was disbanded. They had finally made an ACTUALLY GOOD GAME! And they were rewarded with DESTRUCTION, while all their bad other games kept them in business!

It all just seemed too sad, helped only by the fact that cruel and unfair fates are what Cavia's storytellers like best, so it was all somehow fitting.

But now? They get a chance to make ANOTHER GAME!?

Will they go back to making something strange and terrible like usual, or something strange and MAGNIFICENT like Nier?

Either way, the main character is a woman with a flower growing out of her eye-socket, so either way, it will be a train to crazy-town that I will most definitely buy a ticket to.

FUCK, I LOVE NIER

Square-Enix has been questionable lately, but having published Nier, and getting that band back together to make Drakengard 3 makes so little business sense but so much PERSONALLY MAKE MY GAMIN' DREAMS COME TRUE sense that I love them forever.

[link]

Such a strange, magical world we live in...

My computer and I are reunited (and it feeeeeels so goooood...), hence all the new stuff poppin' up on this gallery, with plenty more to come! Additionally, anyone waiting on something from me can expect it to reach you in the days to come as I set about sorting out and finishing everything up, and if you were interested in commissioning something but were holding off due to my computer issues, I'm once again all ears, so send a note on over if that's your inclination!

But during this hiatus, I did get a chance to reaffirm one of the central tenets of my beliefs: "Wait Until Dark" is the best suspense film of all time. OF ALL TIME.

That movie's climax. Holy shit. Who knew Audrey Hepburn as a badass blind woman VS Alan Arkin as an evil beatnik would be so amazing?

Actually, nah, even typing that out it DOES sound like it would be awesome. And it is! It truly is!

Is sent at last! Yaaaaaay!

A bunch of things going wrong is an ordeal, but it also makes you appreciate when things go right all the more. I will be positively glowing with tranquility next time I work on a for-sale project and I have neither the flu nor a computer keeling over dead. It'll be AWESOME!

As it is, my main computer is in the shop, so I will still be a little scarce online until it gets fixed up, but then I will arise like a phoenix and deploy so much content and so many commissions that the world will be forever changed and adrift in a sea of large, illustrated women.

It'll be intense.

In the meantime, I'll try to stay in touch with folks as best I can anyway, and hey, if anyone is interesting in ordering a commission that will exactly cover my computer's repair costs, that shit would be CONVENIENT

Proving that troubles come in pairs, and that the universe apparently decided I was growing a tad too complacent and needed to pull some tricks to keep me on my toes, the flu was followed up with my desktop computer's motherboard dying.

These past two weeks have been ROUGH, man! Holy geez!

But thankfully the hard drive was fine, so I was able to get everything I needed for Calorie Karma off of it, and so over the next 24 hours everyone can finally expect to get their copies sent to their inboxes as I get the chance. I'll put up a message when it's finished being sent out, likely tomorrow night. Again, thank you everyone for your patience and kindness regarding the delays...it does ease the stress and craziness of big, frustrating setbacks like these to be able to at least rely on the understanding of you folks...and once all these troubles are behind, I look forward to finally and truly getting back into the swing of sweet, blessed normalcy, and you may expect some new additions to the gallery then, as well!

To anyone who has sent a note or email this past week and hasn't gotten a response, my apologies; the flu (or a good flu impersonator...the symptoms match up, but it did mercifully fade faster than I hear the flu usually does, so I DUNNO) struck my poor, unsuspecting home this week, knocking me and my family on our asses. As such, I've spent the past days either sick as a dog, or tending to someone who was (the only one not sick as a dog being, ironically, the dog himself...this saying needs to be rethought, because the available evidence just doesn't support it), so I've fallen behind on all sorts of communication and work! But, everyone is back to at least functional now, SO, in the coming days I'll tend to replies and get back in touch with everyone. Keep the faith!

ALSO! Because of this, I wasn't able to send 'Calorie Karma' out yesterday as planned. I did send those who preordered it a little message explaining the situation, which is unfortunate, BUT, to make up for the situation, I am adding in a bonus drawing for the tale when it is sent out either this Monday or Tuesday...and, if by chance you haven't preordered it yet, WELL HEY, the period available to do so and net the preorder bonus has now widened! ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIIIIIGHT SIDE OF LIIIIIIFE...

(Full love to Holy Grail, but Life of Brian was the best Python movie)

Alright! I'll type more at everyone later, but for now, spend some time being grateful that you're not stuck laying around feeling horribly sick! Unless you are currently stuck laying around feeling horribly sick, in which case get well soon, dammit!

"Age of Gluttony" [link] is gonna be sent out tomorrow night, so if you want in on the preorder bonus action, you've got until then to purchase it up! After that? Nothing but a lifetime of regret, of the preorder bonus that got away. You'll see its shadow in the wind, blowing away out of reach for all your years. In your old age, as you write your memoirs and look back on your 105 years (good job, you long-liver, you!) of accomplishment and worthwhile pursuit, the timeline of your existence will be marred by that one misstep...failing to preorder 'Age of Gluttony'...especially as you went on to order it later anyway, after the preorder deadline, and marvelled at what a delightful and alluring little misadventure it was, but always wondering...what was in the preorder bonus?...what further pleasures and wonders did it hold?...and all those around you when the final hour passes will wonder, why were your last words 'Age of Gluttony preorder bonus'?

And as I, old and frail, hobble to your grave, I will lay upon it a printed out copy of the preorder bonus, wrapped around a dozen roses, a final parting gift for your journey to the great Afterwards. But as your spirit ascends, it can't help but wish you could have perused it when blood yet flowed through your veins...if only you could have told your past self to preorder it on that fateful day of long ago...

In short, don't make your future ghost all sad.

PREORDER IT UP, YOU

[link]

Hey, you know that Savannah lady from that 'The Vore Line' commission I put up?

Did you know she's from a video game?

It's true!

The commissioner's only direction for the leading lady's design was 'long blonde hair', and  so she had that.

But then, I played the jaw-droppingly bizarre 3DS game, 'Tokyo Crash Mobs'.

[link]

A game all about clearing lines of people away, and starring two ladies, one of whom had long blonde hair.

So, I did some retrofitting and tweaking, and as I wrapped up the commission, I made it star her as a fun little homage to this ridiculous game that I'm lovin' the hell out of.

I can't exactly give 'Tokyo Crash Mobs' a full-hearted recommendation to everyone...the gameplay is fun and addictive, but a hot mess in many ways, and the 'Tim & Eric'-esque presentation is an acquired taste, but if you have a 3DS and are willing to take a seven-dollar risk on a fascinating oddity, you could certainly do worse.

ALSO: I'm playing 'Link's Awakening' on my 3DS these days too, having not played the game since my childhood, and my GOD every little thing that happens it is a swift shot to my nostalgia kidneys. Goosebumps, man. Goosebumps.

Game's BEAUTIFUL. I know that it's not a new or novel observation that creative vission matters more than technology, but it is kind of miraculous how the humble li'l Gameboy istallment of the series is in the running for best Zelda game. This thing's got a magic to it, and an atmospheric, bittersweet charm to it that it really only shares with Majora's Mask.

The first time during this play-through that the Ballad of the Wind Fish played, I was like 'aw SHIT the EMOTIONS', because while I forgot plenty about the game, I still remember the ending.

Obligatory reminder that if you want the buff and beautiful preorder bonus included in your purchase, you have until Midnight tonight to order 'Her Muscle Year' [link]

And to those who do have it preordered, you should be gettin' it to happily arrive in your inbox tonight! I think you'll love it.

In what might be the breeziest and most pleasant apocalypse on record, I am taking a moment to do my obligatory final reminder about Fataclysm [link] being sent out tomorrow night, so as you pass the next few days in your underground survival shelter just in case the Mayans were off by a few days, please consider investing in a purchase! It's the perfect way to celebrate the magical golden days between the end of the world, and Christmas.

Thanks to everyone for the happy birthday wishes! I had a lovely day, and seeing a buncha nice messages on here at the end of it was a pleasure. As I outlined in the thanksgiving pic's description, you guys are awesome.

But, with my birthday behind me, and me now a 26-year-old man of action, I must get back into the swing of things, so I'll be sendin' out 'The Fatty Pack' [link] around noon EST to everyone who ordered it, so if you haven't yet, this time or last, you've got 'til then, after which it will disappear from availability once again and be going back into the DISNEY VAULT. A very odd corner of the Disney Vault. I'll be taking the 'Click here to purchase' -link- out of the description at that point, so if you see the button, you still have time! But if it's not there, sitting serenely and welcomingly beneath the teaser image...all is lost. All.

Today's my birthday, which I partially chose to celebrate by goin' around on Black Friday with my family to tend to assorted Christmas shopping because SALES, HOW WONDERFUL THEY ARE.

I might be bad at birthday-having. But Christmas-shopping is so GRATIFYING. And who doesn't love spending their birthday waiting in lines and shoving through hordes of people?

Anyway! Busy as I am, I am just chiming in quickly while I have some downtime to make a li'l proper journal entry for folks that the Timeless/Fatty Pack thing [link] is back available for today only, and will be disappearing again tomorrow morning, so if you'd like to give it a shot, leap upon it now like a cheetah pouncing upon a gazelle that is made out of a hundred drawings of fat women.

...one WEIRD goddamn gazelle...

Anyway! Gotta go, but hope everyone else is having fun celebrating Saxxon's Birthday (other people love the holiday as much as I do, right?), and let me know if anyone desperately needs a 96 cent copy of "Starsky and Hutch" on DVD. Through the magic of Black Friday, everything is possible!

OBLIGATORY FINAL COUNTDOWN REMINDER THING

"Boobs in Overdrive" [link] will spring tomorrow night!

So, click here [link] to preorder it up before then!

You folks'll love it. Seriously, this thing must have come out of an owl's mouth because it's a HOOT!

...ten points if you know where I got that line from, and ten more points if you can tell me why I find it so much more amusing than it really is. And yet ten MORE points if you can explain to my past self that most things that come out of owl's mouth (like those gross pellet things they spit up) aren't exactly a delight and that my project should be left as unconnected to owl mouths in people's minds as possible.

OWLS: they WISH their mouths could produce something half as great as "Boobs in Overdrive"

If you preordered  Vore Galore [link] it should currently be sitting in your email inbox, eager for your ogling! If it's not, then send a note my way letting me know, and I shall REMEDY THE PROBLEM.

And if you missed out on pre-ordering it altogether, well, a little bit of extra time has fallen into your lap. It seems I won't be able to send out the bonus content for it until tomorrow, SO, I figure it only makes sense to not cut people off from the preorder extra until then. If you missed getting it 'til now, you now have until tomorrow night to not only get Vore Galore but also the preorder bonus by clicking

here (Special Edition): [link]

or

here (Vanilla): [link]

After that, though it will have been sent out to everyone, and the door to the preorder content will be closed FOREVERRRRRR.

But hey, at least Vore Galore itself, and the Special Edition content, will be available eternally. Their availability will outlive me, actually. Every time somebody orders 'em, even into the future, my computer will flicker alive in the junkyard, and my spirit will temporarily materialize to carry on it's duty of sending out wacky illustrated fetish stories, with a professional air of commitment that transcends mere life.

Vore Galore [link] shall be sent out tomorrow night, so the time left to preorder is dwindling! Dwindling as assuredly as 'dwindling' is a fun word to type!

So by all means Vore it up, folks, if you haven't already! The story's an expansive delight, and while Vore Galore's availability will remain forever, the preorder bonus you'll automatically get if you buy it before tomorrow night WILL NOT, and will soon be gone forever, off to where the Dinosaurs and Dodos and Tasmanian Tigers roam! How it will fit into the food-chain there remains to be seen, but probably not gracefully.

AND IN RELATED NEWS, the wonderful kindly featured the subtly named partners-in-crime Ms. Galore and Ms. Smartboobs from 'Vore Galore' in two awesome pics, seen here [link] and here [link] so go check 'em on out if you like things that you would like! Which you probably do!

Vore Galore [link] is still available for pre-order!

"Right, for, like...almost a whole 'nother week."

Yes.

"...so why are you reminding us NOW? Usually you don't start with the whole PREORDER NOW, PREORDER NOW, THE SKY IS FALLING schtick until it actually gets close to the end."

True-...

"SO WHY--"

I'm just tryin' to be helpful! I've actually gotten quite a few inquiries and expressions of concern from different folks who thought they might have missed it, to the point that I'm worried maybe I made a typo or just poorly represented the arrangement, so in case I was a big ol' nerd who confused people, I just wanted to assure folks that "Vore Galore" will be emailed out on October 15th, and anyone who purchases their copy before then will get the preorder bonus, ALTHOUGH it will still also be available for purchase after then. Just, y'know. Without the happy fun-time bonus.

So, yes! Just wanted to set folks' minds at ease, since, like I said, more than a couple questions have come to me about it, and I'm REALLY SUPER-PROUD OF THIS ONE.

It is, I feel in my bones, a HOOT.

An absolute hoot.

Anyway, thanks to those who've ordered it so far, and the-potential-for-thanks to any who order it from here on out! Much obliged, and I do believe you'll enjoy it thoroughly!

Oh, and just so this journal entry serves some higher purpose, let's seeeeee, uh...LOOK, THE BEST VIDEO ON YOUTUBE

[link]

Mm-hmm. Still the business.